Saturday, 16 March 2013

Finishing the CELTA

I am very nearly finished now on my CELTA course. In fact, I just have one more teaching practice session left, an hour-long slot which I will do this Friday. I'm feeling both excited and nervous about this - I'm no longer nervous about teaching, as my marks have been getting steadily better since moving to the upper-intermediate group, as has my confidence, but the fact that after this I will get no more input, no more safe space to fail - my next experience teaching will be out in the real world!

It feels strange to really have a "profession" at last. I did briefly work in a Graphic Design company when I was 18, but I don't think I ever really felt like a designer, the one thing I have felt good at and at home doing is working in a shop, which I did from 16-18 and have been for the last year, as well. Retail has taught me many things - my "hard bitch exterior" as I like to call it for one, but it's never really been a long term goal for me. I enjoy working in shops, the banter, the utter tediousness of the customers and the idiosyncracies of verious EPOS systems but working my way up to supervisor or manager has never really been an ambition of mine. So now I'm going to be a teacher. Which is weird because although, like I said, I feel I can now teach, I don't really feel like a teacher. I'm sure this will come.

In the next few weeks I'm going to have a rest, hopefully visit my fiancé in Germany, taking my son finally to see his new home country, and then when I get back it will be a frenzy of working, saving, attempting to learn some rudimentary German, and packing up/selling off the majority of our stuff. I have homes for the pets, because it's not fair to transport a gerbil and a cat cross-channel to live in (all likelihood) a tiny seventh floor flat, especially when the cat practically lives with the neighbour here anyway.

I'm starting to get excited about having a proper family life - I haven't felt like I've really been there for my son recently because I've been so busy working, and it's impossible to juggle work and reasonable childcare hours with the need to be working a certain number of hours per week for tax credit purposes. I'm excited about being in a new country (especially since I've noticed how utterly damp this one seems to be!) learning a new language, which is something I've wanted to do for years but never had a need to do so, and starting a new job which will, in a way, define me as a person. On to the next great adventure!